First: I want to be prepared to “fight” against slow queries, strike the stored procs and functions. Also, I want to know how to create a tactical overview conquering slow apps at all.
Second: I wanna learn how to board Terabyte Databases and tear those “battleships” down.
Third: I want to enhance my skills in wielding the “DMV-sword” properly to strike down only those fragged indexes which really deserve it.
In the evening, after finding the hidden booty , we will kill the rum stock and start singing “Yo Ho –a pirates life for me” or “trololo”. Hopefully no one will send us over the plank into the shark-infested waters. But therefore we have a @SQL_Sentry guarding our backs.
Now…bring me that horizon
“And really bad eggs". Drink up me ‘earties. Yo ho.